writing

When I Die

When I die, there will be no grocery stores in Heaven. There will be no grocery stores, no grocery lists, and best of all, no weight gain to worry about. In Heaven, we will all weigh the same, and will be able to eat anything we want. White velvet cake, tiramasu mousse, pineapple, glazed nuts, every kind of chocolate candy, wine, beer and real cola. There will be no heart disease in Heaven, no diabetes, no need for doctors, no worry about medical insurance.  Women will not have to care for their children, husbands, in laws or parents. Mothers and fathers will be reunited with their lost children and children will be reunited with their siblings. There will be no fractured families, and everyone will share boundless love for one another. God will make sure of that.

Imagine Eternal Life with no cooking, microwaving, buying $6 bottles of spices that you use only a pinch of, lemons that go bad in 3 days, bread that turns green in a week, and milk that goes sour – ever. You see, even though I was once a great cook, makingeverything from scratch, inventive and resourceful, now, at age 61, I am sick to death of having to come up with “what’s for dinner, hon?” 365 days a year.  Yea, what IS for dinner? Burgers, chicken, steak, or fish? A bag of chips might be tasty but that’s a boat load of carbs we can all do without. A 6 pack of Heineken? We would have to run 10 football fields three times at a race pace of 4 minutes to justify that. extravagance.

Second, I hate grocery shopping. I like some grocery stores – the ones that aren’t chains, and actually make an effort to be pleasing to the eye. Stores that allow food manufacturers to bid on front store placement versus sticking outdoor furniture just inside the entrance.  Groceries where I have graced the aisles for 30 years, where the clerks and managers know my name, and are genuinely willing to have a conversation with you.Places where the clerk will order an item for me and call when it comes in. I  shop for convenience and deals but I am not willing to drive around town for $.69 less on a bottle of salad dressing.

Three years ago I began taking a new type of insulin. It is a non-insulin insulin, a drug that works on getting beta cells to work harder versus medicine that totally replaces natural made insulin. In addition, this medicine stabilizes blood glucose, speeds up your metabolism, and tells your brain you are full, as though you have just eaten a 3-course meal. Within the first 3 months of taking Victoza, and with steady exercise, I dropped 20 lbs. A year later I was 10 lbs. lighter than that.  To me, whose glucoses normally were not that high (130-140, when 90-110 is preferable for a type 2 diabetic), but where my A1C (walking around glucose)ran in the 7 region (perfect A1C’s are 5-6), I was still 40 lbs. over weight, and taking 2 pills and sliding scale insulin every day. Victoza became my wonder drug. I saved $100’s of dollars at the grocery store by not buying umpteen pkgs. of chicken to get freezer burn while I tried to figure out how to incorporate it in to a great recipe. Victoza stopped that silliness. I think I am the only person I know who walks in to a grocery store and can come out empty handed. No appetite, no food.

But in Heaven, I will be cured of Diabetes. I will weigh 100 lbs and look great in every outfit I put on (and I will have the perfect outfit for every occasion). The only thing that will weigh more than me will be my wallet from all the grocery shopping money I saved.

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2 thoughts on “When I Die”

  1. Nice commentary Always interesting And I am tired of cooking too- was different when boys were home Did I have more time then? Seems like it!!

    Sent from my iPhone

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